FOCUS DEAR BOY FOCUS

Yes, it has been a while, I just cannot seem to focus lately. I have so many thoughts swirling through my head.

I have tried pretty much everything I know to get back on track and nothing seems to work. Why can’t brains have a reset button, or a task manager at least then I could end certain processes.

I feel like I am missing some important software updates, just need to somehow work out where to start what is the priority?

How do I find a starting point? How do I close the chapter and start a new one?

  • Procrastination
  • Self Esteem
  • Confidence
  • Money
  • Self-Belief
  • Depression
  • Anxiety

Should I attempt to fix them all at the same time or pick one in the hopes it will have a positive knock-on effect for another. Where would be the best place to start?

 

MY HEAD IS SPINNING

My head is spinning with so many thoughts and Idea I have no idea where to start, Ok maybe that’s not entirely correct.

Let’s start with some Facts and Myths about Autism, Because here is the thing I really don’t care if you have an issue with me wanting to be an advocate for a condition that people truly don’t understand.

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THIS IS A WARNING YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Today as I sit here at my computer after spending god know how many hours, researching my family tree and finding in access of 139 people who may very well be related to me.

I look at Twitter, apparently, the 2nd of April was World Autism Awareness Day. I wish someone made me AWARE of that……Seriously!!!!! We still don’t understand what autism really is, how it affects people differently and how it is caused. And yet people like me who are “ON THE SPECTRUM”….(not quite sure what the spectrum looks like) are used as political pawns, hysterical pawns, punch bag, target practice, and everything else in between.

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BROKEN

Over the last two weeks, I have realised that my body is both mentally and physically broken.

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It has taken me almost a week to fix my car, something that would have taken me a day before.

The problem now is………..I just don’t know what to do for the best.

In a few days, I turn 46, most people would probably say ‘yeah what’s the problem’ well the problem is I had so many goals and dreams, and I haven’t achieved any of them.

I have in fact gone backwards whilst other people have gone forward. So how do I take myself out of reverse and back into drive?

Where do I start should I start with my mind or should I start with my body?

 

 

Support

Support Support Support Support Support Support Support
OMG….. I swear if one more person says to me they want to support me, or they want to make sure I have the right support, or that I get the right support.

I may just have to gouge out their eyes with a blunt spoon (please note that due to the fact some Neurotypicals believe Neurodivergent people like me don’t have a sense of humour I don’t really mean I will gouge out their eyes)

What I’m trying to say is if you say you’re going to support me then you had better dam well show me, I don’t do great with words, in fact, I don’t find the word support very supportive, for me, it is very annoying.

For me particularly in this context it means you can’t work here because you don’t work like us, therefore we must show you that we support you by constantly telling you that we will support you and to just make sure you understand that we are in fact supporting you we will make sure the correct amount of emphasis is placed on the word support.

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